By Miguel Suleyman, The Citizen Reporter
(email the author)
Posted Saturday, August 31 2013 at 21:48
Posted Saturday, August 31 2013 at 21:48
In Summary
As evidenced in The Citizen on Sunday’s recent
visits in Tarime and Serengeti districts where the traditional same-sex
marriage is widely practised, most of Western enthusiasts came to find
that nyumba ntobhu, which is translated as ‘woman marrying woman’, is
quite different from West’s lesbianism, which together with gay
marriage, have been hotly disputed in Africa.
Tarime. Mara Region’s same-sex marriage has drawn the attention and criticism of human and gender rights activists.
As evidenced in The Citizen on Sunday’s recent
visits in Tarime and Serengeti districts where the traditional same-sex
marriage is widely practised, most of Western enthusiasts came to find
that nyumba ntobhu, which is translated as ‘woman marrying woman’, is
quite different from West’s lesbianism, which together with gay
marriage, have been hotly disputed in Africa.
“I expected to see a young beauty romancing with
an older woman the way it is done in the West, but what I have seen it
here is quite different from what I thought,” Canadian Steve Mulligan
told The Citizen on Sunday reporter at remote Hekwe, one of the villages
in that widely observes same-sex marriage in Serengeti District.
Mr Mulligan said he couldn’t believe his ears when
he found that same-sex marriage was not about romance and sex, rather
an overwhelming need for children, especially boys, sought to inherit
family properties and other businesses.
“In most cases when a woman is married to another
woman, the younger one is expected to take care of the older one in her
old age and bear her children especially if she is barren,” said Tarime
resident Waitara Meinganyi, who is also a human rights activist.
Explaining further on the practice, 63-year-old
Agnes Robi, who lives with Sophia Bhoke Alex,25, the culture of woman
marrying woman is initially practised as an option for barren women.
“I decided to marry Sophia after finding all my
six children who were girls got married. She has given me one baby girl
already while we are still praying for her to get a baby boy who would
take over this compound when I die,” she said.
Correcting wrong notion that any younger woman is
free to have sexual relations with any man of her choice as long as she
bears children for her, Robi said that was untrue.
“The system enables us to claim the children born
by the other woman so long one pays a bride price to her parents. I paid
six heads of cattle to get her,” she said.
To Australian Connie Huntington, the same-sex marriage looked too discriminative and dangerous to young girls.
“I think the system doesn’t give the girl her
rights to decide on whom she wants to live with since her marriage is
decided by elders,” said Ms Huntington at Kegonga Village in Tarime
after visiting a woman who was living with two wives.
However, the biggest concerns on the practice, in
both Tarime and Serengeti districts was that young men claimed they were
being denied opportunities to marry young women because the latter
continued to be loose knowing that they could choose to be married by
older women.
“Most young women now prefer the same-sex claiming young Kuria
are harsh and violent,” said Sophia when responding to a question
whether her marriage was voluntary or forced.
As viewed by Meinganyi, nyumba ntobhu system will
lose its stronghold if men turn away from violence and start treating
their wives well.
source: The citizen
source: The citizen
